Friday, April 16, 2010

Personal Everest, the Climb

We all have one. We all have a dream that we are dreaming. We all have a moment that we would love to experience from the mountain top.
A friend of mine, very talented friend of mine, has just moved to Nashville to climb his personal Everest. I actually stole this phrase from him. He is a writer, like me, so he has a lot of meaning in just a few words. I love the fact that we are exactly the same age, born the same day, and are both creative and expressive.
His climb is a personal journey that he has had since he was a kid...music...making it a living, a career.
My climb has been about being the "voice of children of divorce," giving them a say, a real voice to tell their stories. It has been a hard climb at times, but I must confess I spent ten years before the climb just standing at the base of the mountain begging myself to take the first step. I am still not completely sure what held me back from taking the first step, but I can tell you what shoved me over the rail and running up the side...DEATH, regret.
I stood helpless, holding the dying hand of one of the most talented musicians I have ever known telling me about his personal regret. The Everest he didn't climb because he thought he would have more time.
Stop standing at the base of the mountain. Climb.

Thursday, April 15, 2010

Laugh



"Humor is the great thing, the saving thing.  The minute it crops up, all our irritations and resentments slip away and a sunny spirit takes their place." -Mark Twain (1835-1910)
My life is entertaining.  This morning I drove my daughter to school with small birds swooping down, flying side by side as I drove...major Snow White moment.  I laughed, yes, out loud and thought it was one of those moments that I usually miss because I am hyper focused on a to do list the size of Texas.
I have missed a lot of moments.  I don't want to do that anymore.  
I want to laugh until milk comes out my nose.  I want to laugh so hard my stomach muscles hurt and I have laugh lines.  Okay, I don't really want the laugh lines, but I do want to start really laughing.
Humor is available...and for free. Okay, not really free, it is usually at someone's expense.
Just take a trip to a public place and start people watching.  Us humans, are hilarious!  We pick our nose at stoplights, we pull chewies from our cracks while waiting at the crosswalk, we even adjust our bras like brutes.  We run down on our trails wearing too tight, too loose, too bright, or too crazy outfits.  
So, be one of the crazy ones...listen to rap music, wear yellow, eat sour patch kids, play with a booger, make fun of yourself....and laugh! 

Monday, April 12, 2010

Rewind

Today I am pillaging through papers looking frantically for my husband's car title because he is buying a new car when suddenly the excitement of the purchase is overshadowed by a letter from my dad.  The find was like a gold treasure, way more valuable than the car we are about to purchase.
So, there I sat in the attic, black Ann Taylor pants and all...dusty...tears rolling down my face because I miss so much.  I miss his beautiful handwriting, I miss his sarcasm, I miss the way he wrote like he was speaking...I miss the way he worked so hard to make it to the post office but sometimes it would take three or four trips back to his house to remember what he was going to mail.
My dad wrote the letter about his excitement of us coming to see him in Florida.  He hadn't lived there very long and he was thrilled to show us his new position at Universal Studios.  He played keyboards professionally and was thrilled to actually have business cards, not to mention a 401K.
He also was needing to express the deep grief the family was feeling as my cousin had been diagnosed with MD like his older brother.  My dad hated sharing bad news....his tender heart needed me to know before I got there.
Brian was entering the master's program at OSU and I was teaching full-time which is why we could finally afford to fly down there.  The trip was wonderful.
I am posting the letter in parts for those of you who knew him.

For those of you who did not know him, know this...if you have not experienced the loss of your daddy...take the time to value him more than a BMW or more than a position at work or even more than whatever your filled in blank is right now.  And please, savor the moments, and keep the letters, you may find yourself on your own attic floor wishing you had worn waterproof mascara and jeans.